We hope you will find this category helpful for deepening and strengthening your own marital and sexual relationship with your husband.

A couple’s marriage and their sexual relationship are intricately connected. It has been shown that when a couple’s sex life is ignored or suffering, it directly affects the health of their marriage. As Frank Sinatra used to sing, “You can’t have one without the other.”

In order for our marriage to grow, it must be nurtured. This demands time for talking together, dating each other, and making occasions for intimate encounters to occur. But what happens when children are added to your family? Those of us who have children know how difficult it can be to find moments to be alone.

Someone once said that “sex causes little children, and children cause little sex.” See if you can identify with the following video clip from a FamilyLife seminar.

After watching this clip, I personally would have suggested to the Raineys that they should have installed a lock on their bedroom door. I highly recommend this to the students in my classes. I can’t imagine a woman being able to relax without one.

There’s a great book I read called, No Time for Sex by David and Claudia Arp. It is filled with helpful ideas on how a married couples can find ways to spend time together, even in the midst of raising children.

Do your marriage a favor and get yourselves a copy of this book.

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We thought it would be helpful to devote this post to traveling with children. While there are many ideas available concerning the best ways to travel with children, what works for you is probably determined by how old your children are. If you have young ones in car seats, your efforts on how to get through the trip successfully will look different from those who travel with teenagers.

Plus, we also realize that you may not be traveling with your children right now, we figured you would find this information helpful for the next time you go somewhere with your family for an extended car ride.

We came across a post written by a lady named Andrea who wrote about viewing time in the car with her family as a unique way to be together. While she admits there are plenty of technological options to keep our children occupied in the car, it also provides a great time of laughing and having fun together as a family.

If you have small babes in car seats, her list of fun family games may not apply to you. very ; however, one day that baby will be bigger. She shares that if your children are able to sing, read, and/or be creative, her games could prove helpful to you the next time your family hits the road.

We hope you enjoy Andrea’s on “Surviving Family Road Trips.”

]]> http://www.sidetrackedmoms.com/games-for-traveling-with-kids/feed/ 0 http://www.sidetrackedmoms.com/teaching-children-about-giving-on-christmas-day/ http://www.sidetrackedmoms.com/teaching-children-about-giving-on-christmas-day/#comments Tue, 16 Dec 2008 13:50:48 +0000 SideTrackedVickie http://www.sidetrackedmoms.com/?p=854 Christmas morning is such an exciting time for children of all ages. The gifts have been bought or made, they are wrapped in beautiful paper  and bows (often during the wee hours of Christmas morning), and the waiting is finally over!

Children, parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles all hurry to enjoy this special time of gift exchanging.

Ever since our first child was four or five, we have emphasized the spirit of giving on Christmas Day. By the time they are this age, they have been able to make a special present for Mom or Dad, or even had some spending money they had earned in preparation for this day.

Something we have found that has helped to teach our children about giving on Christmas Day, rather than getting, was to have them give the gifts they had made or purchased. Here’s how we do this at our house:

Once we are all gathered by the tree, we sit in a circle of some sort–whether it be in a chair, on the couch, or on the floor. This is simply to help everyone be able to see each other as we enjoy this time of sharing.

Then we start at some point in the circle, have that person give a present to someone on their gift list. After the recipient receives their gift, we all enjoy watching them open their treasure. As the gift is being opened, we often hear of a story or occurrence that happened to cause this particular gift to be given to the recipient. This is usually my favorite part of our family time together as I enjoy hearing from the gift-giver’s heart.

Now it’s time for the next present. The person who just opened a gift then finds a gift they got for someone else. (Later on this will usually be someone who hasn’t opened a gift yet, or hasn’t opened one for a long time.) The gift is given, the story is shared, and then the person who just opened a gift, finds a gift they bought or made for someone else.

After awhile, the children will run out of gifts to give, so it is up to Mom and Dad to finish giving away any remaining gifts. And on and on it goes–for several hours actually. Hours, you say? Yes, hours. We’ve grown in size over the years as most families have. With five children, five grandchildren, spouses, and a grandmother, it takes us a while to have fun!

You see, I’ve been involved in many family gatherings where the presents are passed out, a signal is given, and everybody rips into the wrapping paper. This has always been frustrating to me–partly because it’s hard for me to take in everything everyone got, plus I believe it puts the emphasis on “what did I get” rather than “what did I give.”

Feel free to disagree with me on this one; however, after waiting 365 days for this moment, what’s the big hurry anyway?

Now, you ought to see us all tear into our stockings! That’s a whole ‘nother matter indeed!

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This is definitely something I’ve passed on to my kids. I think it’s really important. Even if the gift-giver isn’t giving a gift that is actually from them, the simple act of placing a gift in someone else’s hands shifts the focus to where it needs to be.

As homeschoolers, we often feel insignificant and overwhelmed in this task, yet here we are, finding ourselves “doing it.”

Back in February, 1989, I was a mom, waiting for my third child to start 1st grade so I could have my days to myself. What was I planning to do with all this free time? I don’t remember, but I was positive it was something to get excited about.

When my husband and I decided to homeschool, it was never with the intent of making our children the smartest kids around. Rather, it was to allow our family to remain in close relationship with each other.  We were discovering that having them in school was bringing division and fracturing us as a family. This goal began to come to fruition quite quickly, and certainly beyond my expectations. Simply by having my children spend their days together, going on fieldtrips with my husband, and giving them back some time to work together and simply be children was priceless. We found ourselves having time to play games together, read books together, develop character and life skills, and find opportunities to serve others.

Along the way, two more children were born. Now, most twenty years later, the first three are well educated, productive adults who love the Lord. With the two youngest children in 8th and 9th grade, my job as a homeschooling mom is almost over, but it remains a journey that has truly enriched my life.

Would I have done some things differently? Certainly. I wished I had had more time to teach them about poetry, classical music, and how to run their own business.

Do I have regrets for choosing this path? Absolutely not! While our goal for homeschooling was never about academics, our children learned them because we cared about them and wanted them to succeed.

Could they have learned more? Yes, I’m sure they could have, but we taught them “how to learn” so they could continue to teach themselves what they need to know, and that’s a lifelong skill.

Has it been a sacrifice? I suppose so, depending on what you mean by “sacrifice.” Most would agree that anything worthwhile requires sacrifice. I’ve certainly given up time I could have spent by myself while the children would have been in school. I’m sure there were times I could have gone out to lunch with the girls, or taken bible study classes. However, I’ve gained so much because I did sacrifice my own time.

As I reflect some 20 years later, I feel incredibly blessed that God gave me extra time with my children while they were growing up so we could all make memories we would have missed otherwise. It’s fun to get together today as adults and reflect upon events that happened–good and bad. It’s made me a better person because it has shown me that I could accomplish things I didn’t believe I could. And I don’t even have time to share with you how much I’ve grown and learned about who God made each of my children to be and how much they have impacted my world and those around them.

I certainly don’t want to be admired. All I ask is for people to take the time to see what can be accomplished when families work together. We’ve been able to accomplish so much together, and I simply don’t want to go back to how we did life before 1989. I am humbled by what I believe we would have missed out on had we not taken a step of faith and started this journey.

So, the next time you encounter a homeschooling mom, don’t assume she wants you to admire her or believe you could never do what she does. Instead, listen to her heart and in doing so, you may hear something you desire for your family–even if you believe right now that you could never “do that.”

Take it from a veteran–homeschoolers don’t choose this way of life to be admired. Instead, we pray that others will desire the family life they see displayed in the lives of a homeschooling family.

]]> http://www.sidetrackedmoms.com/some-thoughts-on-why-i-homeschool-my-children/feed/ 3 http://www.sidetrackedmoms.com/hello-world/ http://www.sidetrackedmoms.com/hello-world/#comments Mon, 29 Sep 2008 18:04:43 +0000 SideTrackedFaith http://www.sidetrackedmoms.com/?p=1 Anybody have sidetracked Kids? My oldest son is definitely one of these. But I suppose he gets it honest considering I’m an admitted sidetracked Mom. Poor kid just didn’t stand a chance. I’ve been on him all afternoon to finish one math lesson and it is seriously like pulling teeth.

Kids are pretty smart though. If a bathroom break, requests for food, offers to help with the baby, or other interruptions are successful in sidetracking both of us, they will continue to do what works.

Better get back to work…he’s escaped yet again.

And what school subject is this????

Well, what can I say? What goes around, comes around! Now you know how I felt when you had trouble staying on task.