If you homeschool your children, you’ve probably heard comments from others like, “I really admire you,” or “I could never do that!” For those of you who don’t homeschool, I believe I speak for many homeschoolers when I say we’re not looking to be admired.
As homeschoolers, we often feel insignificant and overwhelmed in this task, yet here we are, finding ourselves “doing it.”
Back in February, 1989, I was a mom, waiting for my third child to start 1st grade so I could have my days to myself. What was I planning to do with all this free time? I don’t remember, but I was positive it was something to get excited about.
When my husband and I decided to homeschool, it was never with the intent of making our children the smartest kids around. Rather, it was to allow our family to remain in close relationship with each other. We were discovering that having them in school was bringing division and fracturing us as a family. This goal began to come to fruition quite quickly, and certainly beyond my expectations. Simply by having my children spend their days together, going on fieldtrips with my husband, and giving them back some time to work together and simply be children was priceless. We found ourselves having time to play games together, read books together, develop character and life skills, and find opportunities to serve others.
Along the way, two more children were born. Now, most twenty years later, the first three are well educated, productive adults who love the Lord. With the two youngest children in 8th and 9th grade, my job as a homeschooling mom is almost over, but it remains a journey that has truly enriched my life.
Would I have done some things differently? Certainly. I wished I had had more time to teach them about poetry, classical music, and how to run their own business.
Do I have regrets for choosing this path? Absolutely not! While our goal for homeschooling was never about academics, our children learned them because we cared about them and wanted them to succeed.
Could they have learned more? Yes, I’m sure they could have, but we taught them “how to learn” so they could continue to teach themselves what they need to know, and that’s a lifelong skill.
Has it been a sacrifice? I suppose so, depending on what you mean by “sacrifice.” Most would agree that anything worthwhile requires sacrifice. I’ve certainly given up time I could have spent by myself while the children would have been in school. I’m sure there were times I could have gone out to lunch with the girls, or taken bible study classes. However, I’ve gained so much because I did sacrifice my own time.
As I reflect some 20 years later, I feel incredibly blessed that God gave me extra time with my children while they were growing up so we could all make memories we would have missed otherwise. It’s fun to get together today as adults and reflect upon events that happened–good and bad. It’s made me a better person because it has shown me that I could accomplish things I didn’t believe I could.
And I don’t even have time to share with you how much I’ve grown and learned about who God made each of my children to be and how much they have impacted my world and those around them.
I certainly don’t want to be admired. All I ask is for people to take the time to see what can be accomplished when families work together. We’ve been able to accomplish so much together, and I simply don’t want to go back to how we did life before 1989. I am humbled by what I believe we would have missed out on had we not taken a step of faith and started this journey.
So, the next time you encounter a homeschooling mom, don’t assume she wants you to admire her or believe you could never do what she does. Instead, listen to her heart and in doing so, you may hear something you desire for your family–even if you believe right now that you could never “do that.”
Take it from a veteran–homeschoolers don’t choose this way of life to be admired. Instead, we pray that others will desire the family life they see displayed in the lives of a homeschooling family.
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It is so encouraging to read your thoughts as a veteran homeschooler. My daughter is about to turn 3, and we decided when she was just a few weeks old that we would homeschool her. Now that she is getting closer to school age, it is a little daunting to think that we alone will be responsible for her education. Like you, we hope to instill in her the ability to inquire and learn on her own, so she will continue to crave that knowledge her whole life through. Thank you for encouraging those of us standing on the precipice of the homeschooling adventure!
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